WTF

The Columbus Crew Rebrands Into A Hockey Stick Manufacturer

After embarrassing me by losing 5-2 on aggregate to Monterrey in the Champions League, the Columbus Crew has rightfully decided to rebrand itself as a hockey stick manufacturer. The 2020 MLS Cup champion will säkər no more, instead turning its collective efforts to providing Sidney Crosby with the finest of lumber. 

The New Columbus Logo

Newcastle Owner Blames ‘Dark Forces’ For Lack Of Success

Newcastle United owner Mike Ashley said it is time for the "dark forces" preventing the Tyneside club from becoming a powerhouse to step aside, after initiating legal proceedings against the Premier League, British media reported.

It is the second legal action that British businessman Ashley has initiated against the league over an aborted takeover attempt by a Saudi Arabian-backed consortium last year.

Arsenal Likely To Miss Out On European Football For First Time In 25 Years After Villarreal Flop

LONDON — Villarreal held out for a 0-0 draw on a nerve-jangling night at Arsenal on Thursday to reach the Europa League final 2-1 on aggregate as visiting manager Unai Emery returned to haunt the London club that sacked him in 2019.

The Spanish side, who had lost their four previous European semi-finals, one to Arsenal in the 2005-06 Champions League, protected their first-leg advantage with a disciplined display.

Narrador Televisivo Lanzó Comentario Racista Para Explicar La Expulsión De Ángel Di María

Manchester City no le dio esperanzas al PSG y lo derrotó por 2-0 para convertirse en el primer finalista de la Champions League 2020-21. La idea era hablar de los goles de Riyad Mahrez o el maravilloso pase de Ederson en la apertura de la cuenta. Sin embargo, en vez de eso, aquí estamos hablando de Jim Beglin, narrador de la transmisión en inglés de CBS y quien al explicar la expulsión del argentino Ángel di María, por una patadita infantil a Fernandinho en el minuto 69, no encontró nada mejor que decir que la tarjeta roja se debía a "ese temperamento latino".

Announcer Makes Racist Comment On Live TV After Di María’s Boneheaded Red Card

Prior to Tuesday, Ángel Di María had played 741 matches for club and country, receiving all of four straight red cards and 80 yellow cards. No one would ever say Di María is a hothead or has a habit of committing bad fouls — even Lionel Messi has more yellow cards in his career. So it makes the racist comment CBS announcer Jim Beglin said after the Di María red card all the more baffling. 

Drone Gets Snatched Mid-Flight And Destroyed After Interrupting Rosario Derby

The Clásico Rosarino (“Rosario derby”) between Rosario Central and Newell’s Old Boys was briefly interrupted on Sunday night by a low-hanging drone carrying a Rosario flag.

In ordinary times, the feat would’ve been roared on by over 40,000 inside Rosario’s El Gigante. However, the drone’s fate was more somber on Sunday as Lucas Gamba snatched it out of the air and dragged it to the sidelines.

Player Quits Football Mid-Match After Opponent’s Suicide Taunt

Albion Rovers striker David Cox said he was retiring from football after being mocked by Stenhousemuir's "bench" over his mental health during Thursday's 1-0 win in a Scottish League Two fixture.

Cox, who was named on the substitutes' bench for the game at Ochilview Park, walked out of the stadium at half-time after the incident.

The 32-year old said in a video on Facebook he was quitting the game after "again having to deal with some mental health shouts at football."

NWSL Announcers Really Need To Fucking Stop Misgendering Athletes

OL Reign beat the Chicago Red Stars 3-2 in one of the more entertaining NWSL Challenge Cup games of the year on Tuesday night. Tziarra King had an assist and scored the late winner, further cementing her as my second favorite NWSL player (just behind of my fellow Aggie Shea Groom). 

But what stood out more than King’s heroics or Mal Pugh’s first goal since 2019 was the continued misgendering of Reign midfielder Quinn by NWSL announcers. It was made all the worse by the announcers making damn sure they used the correct surnames for recently married players.

Toronto FC Espera Con Un Cocodrilo Al Cruz Azul: La Previa De Los Cuartos De Final De La Concachampions

En la previa de su duelo por los cuartos de final de la Liga de Campeones FC ante Cruz Azul, el Toronto FC reveló un nuevo refuerzo. No, no nos referimos al venezolano Yeferson Soteldo, sino que a Ale Gator, un cocodrilo que se apareció en los entrenamientos y que firmó un préstamo a corto plazo con el equipo canadiense.

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