English Clubs

It’s hugely unfortunate for Carabao Cup quarterfinalists Bristol City, but Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s feel-good return following last season’s significant knee injury found its happy ending Wednesday after the big Swede scored in his first start of the 2017-18 season.

It’s a deflected effort from a free kick that should’ve never been awarded, but Bristol’s anger is Zlatan’s sweet redemption. Ibra has made substitute appearances for United in both the Premier League and Champions League over November and December, but the 36-year-old was handed his first start in the League Cup.

Twas’ the night before match day 20, when all through the Prem not a team could stop city , not even DeAndre Yedlin. (or Them - point to Tottenham)

Here are some players you could use for your squad, and don’t you worry, our logic’s not flawed.

Alright - forget the night before christmas schtick. Here are the players you could transfer for this week:

Heung-Min Son (Tottenham):

After tricky back to back away games vs Man City and Burnley. Spurs return home this week vs a Southampton squad that’s struggled for consistency.

Hello folks. We got two matchdays over the holiday weekend. Lets get this thing poppin’ like Buddy the elf in the mail room.

3 Wise Men

Marko Arnautovic (West Ham):

Much like the Abominable Snowman from Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, West Ham’s Marko Arnautovic was once really bad, but now he’s good.

If the Austrian midfielder can get over a slight calf twang before the visit of the team that puts the “ug” in “struggle”, Newcastle United, Moyes’ preferred boy will have his third huge FPL performance in four weeks.

Alberto Moreno, Philippe Coutinho and Roberto Firmino are all having fine seasons for Liverpool, but that has pretty much nothing to do with this video, which depicts the trio engaging in the BLOODSPORT OF MINI GOLF.

Ah, we jest. Mini-golf is not a blood-sport. It is not even a regular sport. It is quite fun though.

Alberto Moreno is OK at mini-golf. The other two are just awful. Firmino especially. The man shot a 10 on the first hole. I wouldn't think that was possible for a coordinated human adult if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes.