Europe

In an absurd first for major international tournaments (so you know it’s coming by way of the CONCACAF Gold Cup), a competing nation has knowingly and willingly knocked itself out of the competition.

Wayne Rooney is back at Everton, and it took just 34 minutes for the prodigal son to make his presence felt in a friendly against Kenyan club Gor Mahia. To use a baseball analogy, Rooney is firmly in the slow designated hitter phase of his career, but he can still hit the occasional home run when the moment arises.

Per Mertesacker is a giant of a soccer player. Giants aren’t known for their agility.

That didn’t stop the 6-6 German from scoring his version of an overhead kick in Arsenal’s first preseason friendly of the new season on Thursday in Sydney, Australia.

The BFG’s goal overshadowed record-signing Alexandre Lacazette’s Arsenal debut. The French striker scored, but who needs a $60 million striker when you can throw Mertesacker in at forward?

Typically, second round qualifiers for the UEFA Champions League are ho-hum affairs featuring clashes between footballing “minnows” from Europe’s lesser leagues and dominant clubs from decidedly top-heavy ones.

Where Scotland’s Celtic FC fits into this picture is up for debate, but what can’t be argued is that its upcoming tie against Linfield FC, a semi-professional club from Belfast, Northern Ireland, will be anything but boring, both on and off the pitch.

If you’re having a bad day, just remember that at least you’re not the goalkeeper for Italian minnow Auronzo di Cadore.

The big, bad boys from the Serie A came to the little commune of just 3,671 in Italy’s Belluno region today. And Lazio did just what you might expect they might do against a tiny side like Auronzo. They won handily. 16-0. Not a very nail-biting performance.

PSG goalkeeper Kevin Trapp makes his living with coordination. His job is to use his superior coordination to stop soccer balls from going into PSG's net.

His bosses, then, will not be happy to see this video of Trapp looking very uncoordinated on a treadmill. PSG's training staff will not be happy either, to be honest.

Kevin Trapp, goleiro do PSG, foi fazer snap correndo na esteira kkkkkkkkkkkk pic.twitter.com/QVURPFfRKx

Mino Raiola, the architect of Paul Pogba, Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Henrikh Mkhitaryan's moves to Manchester United last summer (and Romelu Lukaku's this summer!), is about one thing only: getting his clients (and by extension himself) that money.

When Paris Saint-Germain midfielder Marco Verratti was caught smoking while on vacation in Ibiza, the same alarm bells were ringing in everyone’s heads. As a professional footballer, it’s unhealthy, unprofessional and detrimental to both your career and your club. 

As we all know, smoking is detrimental to footballers in every way imaginable, but it’s incredible to see how the perception of this habit has rapidly changed over the last three or four decades in the professional game.

As we traverse the long, hot and boring summer, we find ourselves lost amid a desert of dullness — a boring expanse of time in which no football is actually played. No club football. No proper international tournament. Even the youth football has finished. Teams are barely beginning their preseason. Quite literally, there is no football to talk about. But the machine never ceases. Which brings us to the transfer market.

Less than 20 years ago, if you wanted to watch the UEFA European Championships you had to dial up pay-per-view for every match. 

Now even the women's games are readily available as you can watch every match of UEFA Women’s EURO 2017 with a basic ESPN subscription. 

ESPN recently unveiled its plan to air all 31 matches at the tournament, which begins July 16 in the Netherlands.