Liverpool was pretty good last year, if you’ll recall. Jurgen Klopp’s side reached the Champions League final and only Manchester City had fewer losses in Premier League play.
This year, the Reds look even better.
The 2018-19 UEFA Women’s Champions League Round of 32 kicked off Wednesday with the likes of Lyon (the three-time defending champion), Chelsea, Wolfsburg, PSG and Linkoping all recording first leg victories.
The most resounding scoreline was Bayern Munich traveling to Serbia to take on Spartak Subotica and winning 7-0. The opening goal of the match was scored by 33-year-old American Gina Lewandowski (no relation to Robert). She previously won this competition with Frankfurt back in 2008, but she has only one USWNT cap to her name.
Excuse me, I have to type this so quietly because Croatia’s hungover as all hell at the moment, and I daren’t wake it. Today, Croatia opened its eyes in Elche before quickly closing them and muttering, “I think I’m going to die. I don’t think partying for 58 days straight was a good idea.”
That’s the amount of time that’s elapsed between the nation’s runners-up finish at the World Cup and today’s 6-0 beatdown at the hands of La Furia Roja — a nickname which certainly sounds like the sort of Fireball Cinnamon Whisky product that’d do your head in.
Portugal defeated Italy 1-0 Monday at the Estadio da Luz in Lisbon to go top of UEFA Nations League Group 3 while Italy crashed to the bottom of the three-team group with only one point from two matches. The Azzurri’s worrisome 1-1 draw with Poland in Bologna last Friday served to foreshadow the day’s events: Italy mustered only two shots on target while creating absolutely nothing of note.
The NWSL regular season wrapped up this past weekend with a mixed bag of business-as-usual and surprising results. All around the league, for playoff bound teams and doormats alike (we’re looking at you, Sky Blue), the level was turned up to 11, giving fans both feel-good entertainment and high quality football to get excited about heading into the postseason.
Atlanta United will certainly make the playoffs on the backend of a terrific season, but D.C. United deprived Tata Martino’s side of clinching while giving its own playoff hopes a major boost by defeating the Five Stripes 3-1 in the nation’s capital.
Wayne Rooney was again instrumental for D.C., assisting Luciano Acosta on the game’s opening goal in the 29th minute before restoring the Black-and-Red’s advantage from the spot in the 52nd. With the match in the balance, Rooney then provided another assist for Acosta in the 77th minute to secure the three points for D.C. United.
Barcelona moved to the top of the LaLiga table on goal difference Sunday after hammering newly promoted Huesca 8-2 at the Camp Nou. Lionel Messi registered two goals and two assists, Luis Suarez added a brace and an assist, Jordi Alba had a goal and an assist and Ivan Rakitic did the same to power the Blaugrana to the top of the table. An Ousmane Dembele strike and a Jorge Pulido own goal rounded off the eight Barcelona tallies.
18-year-old Brazilian wunderkind Vinícius Júnior appeared in his second match for Real Madrid Castilla (Real’s reserve team) against Atletico Madrid B today. The Madrid Derby in Segunda División B (Spain’s third division) ended in a 2-2 draw with Vinícius Jr at the center of everything for Real, scoring a brace while also getting his head munched on by Atletico captain Alberto Rodriguez.
It’s been a rough start for new boss Manuel Pellegrini and West Ham in the Premier League, where the club has opened the new campaign with three consecutive defeats, but the Hammers took a positive step forward by beating League One side AFC Wimbledon in the second round of the EFL Cup Tuesday.
Tottenham’s position as the target of the Meme Lords soccersplaining fury came to an end today following a stirring 3-0 victory over Manchester United at Old Trafford. The internet will now turn its collective fury at Jose Mourinho, who — surprisingly for a 55-year-old and two-time Champions League winner — seems to be genuinely affected by the treatment he’s receiving from various hacks and the Twittersphere.