Outrageous

The Houston Dynamo are in a heated race in the standings as we head into the final stretch of the MLS season. With just a few matches left, Houston leads rivals FC Dallas and Austin FC for the “First Place In Texas And Not Last Place In The West Cup” I just made up. But the Dynamo stumbled in their attempts to not suck as much as the other Texas clubs with a 3-0 loss to the LA Galaxy on Wednesday night, a match highlighted by a Houston Dynamo proposal fail.

If you were able to watch the Champions League on Paramount+ on Tuesday without interruptions, then you were one of the lucky ones. If you’re like me, you were stuck looking up “Paramount plus down” or “Paramount plus Champions League down.” 

The first half went smoothly for me. I watched a bit of the Transnistria underdogs Sheriff and then hopped over to watch Ajax and Dortmund. Everything went wrong when I heard that Sheriff equalized against Inter Milan seven minutes into the second half. When I tried to switch games, I was greeted with this.

Now that Season 2 of “Ted Lasso” has come to a close, fans of the series may be dismayed to learn Apple TV+ only plans to produce one more season of the beloved series. This time next year we could be mourning the end of Ted Lasso’s story at AFC Richmond. Given the success of the series — and the dearth of other programming on Apple TV+ — I wouldn’t be surprised if the series produces a Ted Lasso spinoff or two.

The greatest love story in football — is it David Beckham and Posh Spice? Too tired. Lionel Messi and Antonela Roccuzzo? Too cookie-cutter. Cristiano Ronaldo and Georgina Rodríguez? That’s a Peloton ad. 

No, nothing comes close to Mauro Icardi, Wanda Nara and whoever is completing the messy love triangle at this particular moment in time.

I’ll admit, I was curious. With PES fully rebranding to eFootball and going free to play — something I’ve long thought FIFA should do — I was willing to give the franchise another shot. And yet, I cannot even recommend downloading this janky game right now. 

The internet is divided right now over an incredible video of Borussia Dortmund striker Erling Haaland stacking three balls on top of each other and then proceeding to shoot each one into the upper 90 of a goal. Is the Erling Haaland video real though?

I hate to be that guy, but this video probably isn’t real.

Before we debate, let’s watch the video.

This is real, trust uspic.twitter.com/UExs5LbKUi

If he were American, Didier Drogba would probably still be the starting striker for the USMNT. Instead, the 43-year-old former Chelsea star is spending this international break holding a charity match with his former club, Marseille. Even three years after he retired as a member of Phoenix Rising in the USL Championship, the Ivory Coast international’s still got it.

Samir Nasri, on the other hand, has been enjoying his retirement quite a bit, the 34-year-old having only announced he’s leaving the game a few weeks ago.