South America

Are Venezuelans Taking Over MLS?

Josef Martinez tore up Major League Soccer last season with Atlanta United. The native of Valencia, Venezuela, scored 19 goals in 20 appearances and was a finalist behind teammate Miguel Almiron for 2017 MLS Newcomer of the Year. Martinez’s success set the stage for a new wave of Venezuelans in MLS.

We Got Our First Two Convictions Of Corrupt FIFA Officials

It’s been a long time coming but the first officials have been convicted in a U.S. court stemming from the FIFA bribery scandal that rocked the world's football federation. Jose Maria Marin of Brazil and Juan Angel Napout of Paraguay were found guilty of racketeering conspiracy on Friday, the top charge they faced in the New York federal court. 

Peru’s Paolo Guerrero Will Get To Play In World Cup After All After FIFA Partially Upholds Appeal

Paolo Guerrero will be able to play in the World Cup after all. A couple weeks after FIFA suspended the Peruvian captain for a year for testing positive for a banned substance, FIFA partially upheld Guerrero’s appeal and reduced his ban to six months. Because the ban began in November, he will be back in time for Peru’s World Cup opener against Denmark.

Kaka Has Retired From Professional Soccer

Kaka, one of the best attacking footballers ever, the last player not named Messi or Ronaldo to win the Balon d'Or, has announced his retirement from professional soccer.

FIFA Corruption Trial Defense Lawyer Makes Case Client Was Too Clueless To Be Crooked

The FIFA corruption trial for three South Americans started weird, got weirder and ended with a little bit more weird on Thursday in New York City. During the closing arguments, the defense attorney for a former president of Brazil’s soccer federation basically tried to make the case that his client was too dumb to be involved in the bribery scandals that have rocked FIFA.

Omar Gonzalez Gets Torched As Pachuca Is Knocked Out Of The Club World Cup

In continuing the theme of 2017 being a sh*t year for U.S. soccer, the lone American at the Club World Cup was at fault for the goal that knocked Mexico’s Pachuca out of the competition on Tuesday at Hazza Bin Zayed Stadium in the UAE. Gremio’s Everton turned Omar Gonzalez inside out before curling in a wonderful shot to give the Brazilian side a 1-0 victory in extra time.

Gonzalez apparently thought he was still playing for the USMNT, perhaps against Trinidad and Tobago. 

FIFA Punishes Edwin Cardona For Racist Gesture, But Not Enough

Colombia’s friendly against South Korea on Nov. 10 did not endear the South Americans to the world. Midfielder Edwin Cardona made a racist gesture to South Korean players following an embarrassing flop by James Rodriguez. We wrote then that if FIFA had any sense, Cardona would be given a lengthy ban lasting through the World Cup.

Peru’s Paolo Guerrero Tries To Be Maradona, Gets Banned For World Cup

Paolo Guerrero thought he could be Diego Maradona. Now Peru’s captain and all-time leading goal scorer will be suspended for the country’s first World Cup in 36 years. FIFA handed down a 12-month ban to Guerrero for testing positive for a banned stimulant following a CONMEBOL World Cup qualifier, football’s world governing body announced Thursday.

Jonas Brother Takes Stand At FIFA Corruption Trial … Wait What?

No one ever said the FIFA corruption trials would be normal. But I don’t think anyone expected this bizarre turn of events. Kevin Jonas was called to the stand to testify for the prosecution during the ongoing court case on Thursday at a U.S. Federal Court in Brooklyn. 

According To Dad, Thiago Messi “Is A Phenomenon,” Mateo “A Son Of A Bitch”

We’ve got it, we’ve pinned down two-year-old Mateo Messi’s future on the pitch. After graduating from La Masia summa cum laude, the phenom will replace a 45-year-old Sergio Busquets in Barcelona’s holding midfield role, because, according to father Lionel, Mateo is “un hijo de puta.” He’s a real mean sumbitch.  

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