WTF

Newcastle Scores Bizarre, Slow Motion Goal After VAR Overturns Offside Decision

Two stats stood out ahead of today’s Premier League match between Sheffield and Newcastle United at Bramall Lane: (1) Andy Carroll was handed his first Newcastle start in almost nine years and (2) Martin Dúbravka was busy making his 65th straight EPL appearance for the Toon, a run which began directly following his move from Sparta Prague back in January of 2018.

Both players played massive roles in Newcastle’s bizarre 2-0 victory. 

Lionel Messi Booked For Diving After Telling Ref Not To Call A PK

Seeing Lionel Messi dive is about as rare as seeing the Argentine pick up a red card. It might happen from time to time, but not enough for anyone to legitimately call Messi a flopper.

Don’t tell that to 36-year-old referee Clement Turpin, who officiated Barcelona’s Champions League match against Borussia Dortmund on Wednesday at the Camp Nou.

Edinson Cavani’s Dad Vandalizes His Property To Remind Him Of UCL Failure

Imagine you’re in Edinson Cavani’s shoes this morning, strolling around the streets outside the Bernabéu in search of that precious, caffeine-rich mate before tonight’s big Champions League encounter with Real Madrid.

You’re not in the best spirits. You’ve missed a good portion of the season through injury, and in your absence, that goddamn Mauro Icardi has scored 10 goals in 11 games to take your job. Now everyone wants to offer Icardi a permanent contract and is totally fine with yours expiring in the summer!

Diego Maradona Quits Gimnasia After Two Months On Job

Diego Maradona is quitting Gimnasia, and we don’t mean the gym. (We’re pretty sure he quit that long ago.)

Rather than stay to fight relegation, Maradona, 59, resigned from Gimnasia La Plata in the Argentine Superliga after just two months as head coach. Gimnasia currently sits in 22nd out of 24 clubs but in worse shape facing relegation. The club lost Maradona’s first three matches in charge but had won three of the last five.

Coach Of Italian Youth Team Fired After 27-0 Win

In the 1885-86 Scottish Cup, Arbroath defeated Bon Accord 36-0. In the 2019 FIFA Women’s World Cup, the USWNT beat Thailand 13-0. In the 2019 NCAA Women's College Cup, Stanford beat Prairie View A&M 15-0. Throughout the course of history, the trend of scoring an excessive amount of goals has continued to receive backlash from all levels.

If Kevin De Bruyne Wears UNTUCKit, Then I’m Going To Wear UNTUCKit

Did you ever wear your shirt untucked, look at yourself in the mirror and scream: “GOOD GOD, WHY IS THIS UNTUCKED LENGTH SO UNBECOMING ON MY PERSON?!” I never did that either, but then UNTUCKit came along and introduced the thought into my head. 

The casual men’s clothing company now has 80+ stores across the U.S. and Canada and entered the NFL Hall of Fame in 2019 after airing a commercial starring Drew Brees dragging the "NOLA No-Call.”  

CBS Confirms Univision Will Dominate Champions League TV Ratings For Years To Come

We hate being right.

Last week, CBS won the bidding war with ESPN, NBC and Fox for the U.S. Champions League TV rights. We worried it could be bad for English-language viewers.

Our fears were confirmed Tuesday.

Time To Run: There’s A Flaming Lion On The Roof Of This Stadium

The below video is footage of Estudiantes celebrating a return to Estadio Jorge Luis Hirschi in La Plata, where the club played between 1907 and 2005 before a 14-year stay at Estadio Único. 

I can’t confirm anything, but I’m pretty sure the construction workers — much like the dwarves of Moria — dug far too deep during their renovations of the stadium and unleashed a Balrog. I have no other explanation for this demonry. 

Bundesliga Match Descends Into Chaos After Manager Is Clotheslined By Player

One look at the Bundesliga table — with Borussia Mönchengladbach currently on top — tells you that it’s been a wild season so far in Germany. But that adjective doesn’t come close to describing the scenes that unfolded at the end of today’s match between SC Freiburg and Eintracht Frankfurt at the Schwarzwald-Stadion.

Joga Bonito Or Capoeira? Brutal Scything Challenge Answered With Kick To Chest

What does Joga bonito mean? 

Well, we can show you what it doesn’t mean.

Joga bonito usually refers to Brazilians playing the beautiful game beautifully, as only Brazilians can. Think 1970 Brazil in full flowing force or the 2002 Canaries zipping past all comers. It’s Pelé, Ronaldo and Ronaldinho.

But this clip out of Brazil on Saturday shows the complete opposite of Joga bonito, looking more like capoeira than anything else. 

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