Announcers

Roma completed one of the biggest comebacks in Champions League history by overcoming a 4-1 deficit after the first leg in Barcelona. They advanced to the semifinals on away goals after winning the second leg 3-0. When Manolas headed in the game-winning goal everyone (except Barca fans) went crazy: the players, the coaches, the fans, but the best reaction came from Roma’s commentator. This man was screeching like a little kid who got Nintendo 64 for Christmas.

Mario Melchiot knows more about football than you or I. He knows more about football than the both of us combined. A native of Amsterdam, Melchiot was a product of the legendary Ajax youth system, making his debut for the first team as a 20-year-old before transferring to Chelsea at just 22.

He played extensively in the Premier League for the Blues, Birmingham City and Wigan Athletic, as well as amassing 22 international caps for the Netherlands over an eight-year international spell.

Football is a sport of moments, of building up to a climax and exploding with joy, relief, anger or sadness. It is in these moments that football announcers show their true worth. But in the debate of English vs. Spanish football announcers we just made up, there is no doubt in my mind who wins. 

Sunday’s 1-1 draw between Newcastle United and Crystal Palace at Selhurst Park kept both teams rooted in the Premier League’s 10-team relegation scrap, and perhaps that was the motivation for this pitch invader’s attempt to literally drown his sorrows on the field. 

The man’s antics included pouring beer all over his face, going on a short jog before getting absolutely truck-sticked by a vigilant steward and then offering a flurry of wanker gestures and Bronx salutes while being escorted from the ground. What a day out.