English Clubs

Each narrative in the English Premier League has a nauseatingly long lifespan until it utterly annihilates itself — it’s annually cyclical, like the depiction of a serpent eating its own tail. We belabor the same statistics, the same trends and the same memes until we’ve had our fill, proceeding to damn them out of existence like a child pop star whose career of cultural martyrdom has run its course.

Alexis Sanchez doubled down on his message of hope to fans today after he scored in Arsenal's 4-1 thrashing of Stoke City. After hooking up with Mesut Özil in the first half to provide an assist, Sanchez scored easily himself in the second half before asking to be subbed off due to a thigh injury. But not before celebrating his goal with this cryptic message for fans:

With two games to spare, Chelsea have clinched the Premier League title, their second in the past three years. After finishing a meager 10th last year under Jose Mourinho, manager Antonio Conte injected new life into the club, and there was never much doubt that they would lift the trophy once the calendar turned.

It only took Michy Batshuayi 6 minutes to secure Chelsea their 2nd Premier League title in 3 years.

It was very fitting that a Antonio Conte tactical substitution is what clinched the Blues their Premier League title. In Conte’s last 4 years (3 at Juventus and 1 at Chelsea) he has 4 league title.

Here is the 23-year-old Belgian’s goal that will forever etch his name in Premier League history.