Europe

There’s no escaping the fact that the draws for the Champions League and the Europa League are ridiculous. These hugely overdone gala affairs take three hours to achieve what could be done in ten minutes. The saving graces - scowling club directors, getting to see Clarence Seedorf again - are vastly overshadowed by the ludicrous complexity of everything and UEFA’s willingness to blow their own trumpet at every conceivable opportunity. The entire event is comical, but it doesn’t really matter.

Chelsea defeated Sunderland 1-0 on Wednesday to open an early six-point gap on nearest rivals Arsenal and Liverpool. The goal was scored by Cesc Fabregas, a player who suddenly looks very much like the footballer that led Chelsea to the 2014-15 Premier League title by forming an excellent understanding with Diego Costa. 

Every year, Wikipedia founder Jimmy Wales issues a plea to the website's users to donate to the nonprofit, ensuring that it maintains its independence, remains ad free and continues to perform optimally. However, according to The Washington Post, the nonprofits’s appeals have been so effective over the years that the website has tens of millions of dollars sitting in reserve. 

Zlatan Ibrahimovic is getting a statue in Sweden. Zlatan's statue does not have a shirt on. Not wearing a shirt is a very Zlatan thing for a statue to be doing.

The real Zlatan took a picture with the Zlatan statue.

According to The Telegraph, Chelsea’s Brazilian attacker Oscar is on the verge of completing a historic transfer to Chinese Super League club Shanghai SIPG. SIPG made waves back in June by signing Hulk for a record fee of £47.5 millionNea, but Oscar looks set to join his fellow Brazilian and smash that record in the process.

Saturday’s match between Bundesliga leaders RB Leipzig and relegation-threatened FC Ingolstadt was remarkable in that the team at the bottom pulled off a highly improbable 1-0 upset. 

What was exceedingly exceptional was what transpired in second half stoppage time. Referee Markus Schmidt, who’d apparently just put down Niccolo Machiavelli’s The Prince before running out to officiate this match, showed that it is indeed safer to be feared than loved.

When it comes to the Premier League this season, many are seeing it as one of the most unpredictable campaigns in recent memory. There are plenty of quality teams battling it out at the top end of the division, but when you take a good look, there are only a few real contenders that shine through. Unfortunately for any Gunners fans out there, Arsenal do not fall into that category.

After his first game managing in the Premier League, Pep Guardiola was asked if he would sacrifice his style for results. He boldly answered, "Impossible, impossible. It's a sacrifice for what reason? If you lose a game, and you believe in it, you keep going.”

The 2016-17 UEFA Champions League Round of 16 draw took place early Monday morning in Nyon, Switzerland and left us with some very entertaining match ups:

Atletico Madrid, in their second game since manager Diego Simeone confirmed he intends to leave them for Inter Milan someday, played like a team whose manager had recently said he intends to leave them someday. Villarreal had much less trouble scoring than would be expected against one of the world's best defensive teams.