Fails

For a moment, Gonzalo Bueno on the Uruguayan U20 national team saw his dreams laid out in front of him. He got on the end of a perfect pass, played it brilliantly, got past a defender and a goalkeeper without even touching the ball. The net was gaping and it must have felt like something out of a childhood fantasy. Perhaps that thought was too mesmerizing, because instead of scoring, he made a fool of himself.

A phantom goal sounds like a power up in Mario Soccer (or should I say Super Mario Strikers), as in it sounds like the ball turned into some sort of ghost and diffused into the back of the net. It sounds pretty sweet, really, but sadly there are no ghosts involved in this real life phantom goal. 

It was scored by Bayer Leverkusen’s Stefan Kiessling against Hoffenheim in the Bundesliga, and while there are no ghosts, it certainly seems to defy explanation at first. 

All of you remember Lionel Messi’s goal against Bayern Munich in last year’s Champions League semifinals. It was an absolute destruction of one of the world’s best teams, and arguably the greatest goal Messi ever scored. You might be surprised to find out that Ronaldo had a similar goal. It was the best Ronaldo goal ever scored, or it would have been, had it counted. 

Here at The18, we are fully aware that most people who don’t like soccer can count the tendency of players to “make the most” out of contact among the reasons that they don’t like the game.

You know, someone gets a kick to the back to the leg — a foul definitely, but nothing crazy — and all of the sudden they are rolling 10 feet along the ground. It’s annoying, even for a seasoned fan. So, the following video probably won’t convert many people to the game…

Sergio Aguero is a frustrating striker for Manchester City fans. He’s ridiculously good when he’s on form, but he just isn’t on form all that often. Injuries have often been to blame, but that doesn’t make him any less inconsistent.

So Viktoria Plzeň's David Limbersky is a class A idiot, and he absolutely does not give a single f***. We’re about to find out how that last part is going for him real soon. Limbersky is apparently attempting to see how much he can try the patience of the Prague Police Department, or at least that’s what it seems like.  

This…is unfortunate. I am absolutely sure that during the 5 minutes immediately after the following ordeal, defender Helen Eke probably wanted to crawl into the nearest small dark space and stay there until the laws of physics and the slow crawl of inevitability transported her to the other side of the planet. 

Depending on who you ask, Drake is either the greatest rapper of all time, or a representation of everything that is wrong with people today. That sounds like a harsh set of extremes, but, really, it’s no exaggeration.

It’s unfortunate that Drake might have added another set of harsh extremes for those to judge him when he uploaded this video of him shanking a kick and breaking a lamp in what we assume is his own back yard tennis court.