Funny

The Obvious Giveaways That You Might Be A Goalkeeper

Everyone knows that goalkeepers are a quirky bunch, heck you have to be a bit nuts to actually enjoy facing flying projectiles hit with excessive force. Being a keeper entails toeing the line between being eccentric and being flat-out crazy. Below are some of the strongest indications that you might be a goalkeeper.

Signs You Might Be A Goalkeeper...

You are very particular about the type of surface you play on

Andy Carroll Is Back And Better Than Ever

When Andy Carroll resigned for Newcastle United on a free transfer last August, the local hero was handed a heavily incentivized contract that largely depended on the 31-year-old’s notoriously fickle bill of health.

Andres Iniesta Is Very Relieved His Statue Now Has Pants

In 2010, Andres Iniesta scored the type of goal for which statues are made, netting the winner as Spain claimed its first World Cup title with a dramatic win over the Netherlands. A decade later, that statue is almost ready to be unveiled.

Almost.

Set to be inaugurated on July 10, a day shy of the 10-year anniversary of the goal, we recently got a sneak peak of the Andres Iniesta statue. Except, uh, Iniesta was sculpted in the nude for some reason.

Celta Vigo Granted Emergency Transfer For Injured Keeper, Signs Striker Nolito Instead

Celta Vigo’s backup goalkeeper Sergio Alvarez is out for the season with knee ligament damage he suffered in May. Due to Alvarez being out for the season, the Spanish football authorities granted Celta permission to make an emergency signing of another player in LaLiga or a free agent. 

With the No. 2 keeper injured, most people would expect the club to sign a player to take his place. Instead, Celta decided that the only way to avoid relegation — only two points separates the club from the relegation zone — is with the signing of its former striker Nolito from Sevilla.

David Luiz Is Enjoying The Finest Season In The History Of Memes

The Premier League returned Wednesday after a 100-day hiatus like it had just left its keys, wallet and cell phone. Nothing has changed: Aston Villa vs. Sheffield United featured a heinously controversial abuse of technology, and Manchester City vs. Arsenal continued the ballad of David Luiz. 

Goal-Line Technology Breaks And Misses Obvious Goal During EPL Restart

If it was sporting controversy you missed, the Premier League restarted Wednesday in a big way. Relegation-threatened Aston Villa hosted European-hopeful Sheffield United at an empty Villa Park, and things descended into chaos shortly before halftime.

Sheffield should’ve opened the scoring in the 42nd minute with a free kick that ended up in the back of Villa’s net, but that’s apparently not the definition of a goal anymore in our new normal.

Sergio Aguero Gives Everyone A Spanish Lesson

As quarantine rages on and Netflix watchlists become shorter and shorter, these footballers are giving us more content. But, probably not the kind you're hoping for.

This video shows Sergio Aguero trying his hand at something new: teaching. He explains how to count to 12 in Spanish. 

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