Highlights

Halfway Line Goal From Impossible Angle The Toast Of Brazil This Weekend

This one grows on you. It’s like a new album from a band that you’ve been listening to for 10 years. At first, this all seems remarkably familiar, maybe even too familiar. You start to worry that you might not actually like it and that you’re just a tedious old cynic now.

“Oh great, another goal from midfield! It’s probably just the keeper's fault. You’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.”

The Iraqi Super Cup Was Ridiculously Nutty

Iraqi soccer doesn’t exactly get a lot of exposure in the English-speaking world, but Friday’s Iraqi Super Cup between Baghdad rivals Al-Zawraa and Al-Quwa Al-Jawiya in Karbala was absurdly ludicrous and ludicrously absurd. It was a match you had to see to believe. 

Most readers will probably never have heard of Al-Zawraa and Al-Jawiya so we’ll spare you the details and get right to the silliness. 

Arsenal’s Comprehensive Win Over Rival Tottenham Only Makes Gunners Fans More Frustrated

Arsenal fans gave the mercurial Mesut Ozil a standing ovation as he was subbed off with the Gunners holding a 2-0 lead over archrival Tottenham they would not relinquish in the North London Derby on Saturday at Emirates Stadium. It was the type of adoration bestowed upon a man of the match who had given everything to defeat a hated foe.

And yet it was a performance that only made Arsenal fans grow more frustrated with Ozil and the team they love.

Dortmund Shows Impressive Teamwork To Hilariously Gift Stuttgart A Goal

Borussia Dortmund has not had a great month and a half, but maybe the club can take solace in the impressive teamwork that led to a goal Friday — even if that goal was scored by Stuttgart. As the Bundesliga returned from the international break, Dortmund defender Marc Bartra and goalie Roman Burki combined to great effect to allow Chadrac Akolo to score in the fifth minute. 

Virginia Torrecilla Sensed Something Special, But She Couldn’t Have Expected This 45-Yard Golazo

The UEFA Women’s Champions League Round of 16 wrapped up today, and the best goal of the round almost certainly belongs to Montpellier’s Virginia Torrecilla. The 23-year-old Spanish midfielder put the finishing touches on a 9-2 aggregate victory over Brescia with this inch-perfect 45-yard lob. 

You Wanted A Hit. Well This Is How Daniel Adlung Does Hits

30-year-old German midfielder Daniel Adlung really caught a hold of that one, huh? This rip evened the score for Adelaide United in their A-League match against Central Coast Mariners on Thursday, allowing Ryan Kitto’s 93rd minute strike to constitute the game-winner for the Reds.

Adlung, who represented Germany at the U-21 level, just arrived in Australia back in September after a 12-year professional career in his native country, including lengthy spells with FC Energie Cottbus and 1860 Munich.

15 Great Goals From Footballers That Generation Z Only Knows As Managers

Generation Z . . . psh. Am I right my Baby Boomers? Baby Boomers . . . cripes. You feel me my Gen Z-ers? But not so fast — I’m here to bridge the incommunicable divide between those that’ve had the same job out in the ‘burbs for 50 years now and those that’ve hopped between three jobs over the past week in Gentrified City. 

Football will be our olive branch, and footballers turned managers will be our common ground. For boomers, sit back and enjoy the nostalgia. For Generation Z, look at Antonio Conte without any hair! 

Bearded Hero Jedinak Lifts Socceroos Into The World Cup

Australia captain, defensive midfielder and rugged bearded hero Mile Jedinak had the game of his life, scoring a hat trick to propel the Socceroos to the 2018 World Cup with a 3-1 defeat of Honduras on Wednesday in Sydney. Jedinak scored on a free kick and two penalty kicks before Honduras’ Alberth Elis scored a consolation goal in the fourth minute of stoppage time. The first leg of the intercontinental playoff was a 0-0 draw in Honduras.

Anthony Martial Abuses Germany Defense, But Die Mannschaft Claws Back With Late Equalizer

Anthony Martial did some bad, bad things to the Germany defense on Tuesday in Cologne. Alexandre Lacazette scored two goals. But, because this was still Germany, the home side scored late to earn a 2-2 draw in a friendly between two World Cup favorites.

Both teams are looking to build a little cohesion in the buildup to the 2018 World Cup and while much of the match was played with a relaxed demeanor, France will be disappointed to have given up the lead with a 93rd-minute equalizer. 

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