Humor

MLS Partners With David Guetta To End Racism Once And For All

It was a tense week in Minnesota. While the vast majority of our thoughts and actions were centered around peacefully protesting the death of George Floyd in police custody, it was impossible to shake the sense of apprehension that came with reports of arson, opportunistic looting, outside agitators (white supremacists? anarchists?) and suspicious unmarked vehicles tooling around town, all under the shadow of a global pandemic. 

My Concacaf Starting 11 Can Whoop Any Squad

Let’s start with some ground rules.

  • We’re using a 4-3-3 formation
  • We’re not taking real-life chemistry between players into account
  • We’re considering the player’s current form

OK, enough of that. Here’s my Concacaf 11 lineup broken down by position:

Neymar Pulls One Of The Best Soccer Pranks On His Own Son

While the Premier League and Serie A both announced their return dates, Ligue 1 players have some waiting to do with the season canceled. With Ligue 1 over and no international soccer for the foreseeable future, stars in the French top flight like Neymar have to find some way to pass the time.

The Brazilian star opted to egg his own son on Instagram.

Playing Football On A Pitch Full Of Legos Looks Painful AF

Professional English freestyler Ewan Baggott has made his mark by performing skills in front of thousands and meeting some of the best in the game. His sick tricks are mesmerizing, but a recent video has surfaced on the internet that will make you virtually feel like you’re in pain. 

Everybody knows stepping on a Lego is almost as painful as stubbing your toe, but imagine playing a match barefoot on a field full of Legos. Who knows why they decided to torture themselves, but it did make for a pretty entertaining video and even some nutmegs.

Social Distancing Shopping Cart Soccer Is The Weirdest Thing You'll See Today

Various sports leagues and countries — including the NFL and USA — are keeping a close eye on Germany and the Bundesliga to see how a league can best operate during a pandemic. The Germans have always seemed to be one step ahead with mass testing, tracking and precautions to ensure the safety of players and staff.

Now, the latest German innovation for safety is here and it’s called Shopping Cart Soccer.

Gareth Bale Has A Message For His Golf Critics: Who Cares?

Real Madrid forward Gareth Bale says he is still confused that his love for playing golf has caused such a stir in Spain and questioned why other elite sportsmen are not criticized for playing the game. 

Despite winning four Champions League titles with Real and scoring crucial goals in three finals, Bale still divides opinion in Spain due to a perceived lack of commitment as well as a poor injury record, which the Spanish media have often blamed on his passion for playing golf in his spare time. 

Cristiano Ronaldo Brings Back His Old Hair. The Nostalgia Is Overwhelming

Cristiano Ronaldo must have seen the hurtful comments about a photo taken of him in his car on his way to rejoin Juventus in training. The Portuguese star has decided to drop the man-bun and throw it old school with this early 2000s hairstyle.

Scottish Club Has Fans Vote Whether Or Not To Extend Goalkeeper's Contract

Livingston FC third-choice goalkeeper Garey Maley was definitely up all night making fake Twitter accounts to vote for a contract extension. In one of the most bizarre moves ever seen, the Scottish club put Maley’s fate into the hands of the fans with a Twitter poll.

Oh Sweet Baby Jesus What Happened To Aubameyang’s Magnificent Hair?

Premier League players resumed to small-sided training sessions this week in a bid to return to action by June. It was our first look at many of the league’s most popular players in about two months, the country having been on lockdown since football ground to a halt in mid-March. 

A few players emerged from self-isolation looking better than ever. For many, sadly, quarantine did not treat them or their heads kindly, chief among them Arsenal striker Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang.

Abby Wambach’s Partner Can’t Decide What’s For Dinner And It’s Destroying Her

Abby Wambach, the greatest goal scorer in U.S. soccer history, knows how you feel. 

She understands the torment you face every day, the agony of decision plaguing couples every single night. The anguish, frustration and heartache over the inability to make one fucking decision.

Abby Wambach is all of us.

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