Humor

Things You Didn't Want To Know About The Two New MLS Expansion Teams

Nashville or Miami? With the start of the 2020 Major League Soccer season right around the corner it’s time to take a closer look at the two new MLS expansion teams. This will absolutely be the most in-depth comparison you could possibly receive for the two new teams in Nashville and Miami.

Harry Maguire Removes Michy Batshuayi's Ability To Reproduce

Harry Maguire of Manchester United decided to give Chelsea’s Michy Batshuayi the boot . . . literally. During the first half of the Red Devils-Blues showdown, Maguire kicked Batshuayi where it hurts most.

It’s Probably For The Best That Vicks VapoRub Has Disappeared From The Game

It used to be a common sight in football, particularly if you had Arsenal on the television and midfield enforcer Patrick Vieira was out there crunching people: a gobshite stain between the nips of players that was actually a hearty application of Vicks VapoRub.

There was a common misconception that the lovely bit of goo was actually mucus, which is a decent enough shout given footballers’ love for blowing delicious snot rockets.

The Biggest Football Player Transformations

Players change their style all the time — I swear Neymar is on his 10th hairstyle by now. To avoid the mundane, people enjoy switching it up and acquire a new look from time-to-time. Eventually someone won’t even resemble their younger self and that’s what nearly all the players on this list of biggest football player transformations have done.

Which USMNT/USWNT Player Would Make The Best ‘Survivor’?

Tonight, Wednesday, Feb. 12, marks the start of the 40th season of “Survivor.” Still going strong with Jeff Probst and a group of castaways, Survivor has been airing two seasons a year for about 20 years, redefining reality TV, for better or worse.

But what if our favorite American soccer players were cast on Survivor?

The Best And Worst Youth Sports To Referee

After 12 years away from the sphere of youth refereeing, I feel like I can finally come clean. While there’s a lot to like about making officiating your main means of employment throughout high school — namely the fact that you get to be outside while your friends construct thousands of take-and-bake pizzas at Papa Murphy’s — there’s also a fair degree of post-traumatic stress.

Remember When Roberto Carlos Was An Absolute Menace In Old Pepsi Commercials?

Roberto Carlos built his reputation off winning everything and stonking thunderbastards wherever he went. He was like that new species of dinosaur they just discovered, the “Reaper of Death,” because going toe-to-toe with him marked the endpoint of your existence. 

John Oliver’s Story Of His First Liverpool Match Is Far Too Relatable

John Oliver, a proud Liverpudlian, is now a U.S. citizen. The comedian and former The Daily Show correspondent is about to start his seventh season of his hit HBO show “Last Week Tonight.” But all he really wants to talk about is his love for Jurgen Klopp and Liverpool FC.

10 More Possible Name Replacements For Inter Miami

Inter Miami isn’t off to a hot start and its inaugural season has yet to begin.

Back in April of 2019, Serie A club Inter Milan filed a trademark claim for the “Inter” prefix, and today it was revealed that David Beckham’s club lost the first round of the legal battle. If the Italian giant ends up winning, then there will need to be an Inter Miami name change.

Italian Carnival Spawns Another Cristiano Ronaldo Statue Nightmare

Just when Cristiano Ronaldo thought he was safe from ridiculous statues, a carnival in Italy has created one of the scariest Ronaldo statues yet.

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