Jozy Altidore And Sloane Stephens Are Hotter Than Dom Dwyer And Sydney Leroux Right Now

Move aside Sydney Leroux and Dom Dwyer, Jozy Altidore and Sloane Stephens are the new hot couple in American sports.

The two childhood friends have reportedly been dating for at least a couple months and both had big wins on Saturday. Stephens won her first grand slam by taking down Madison Keys 6-3, 6-0 in the U.S. Open. Altidore scored a brace in Toronto FC’s 4-0 victory over San Jose. 

Houston Dynamo Return Home Saturday With Proceeds Benefitting Harvey Relief

Houston is trying to return to normal and the Dynamo are returning to Houston. After a two-and-a-half-week layoff, the Houston Dynamo are back at BBVA Compass Stadium on Saturday with a match against Colorado, with proceeds going to Hurricane Harvey relief. 

The Dynamo will have a number of promotions to support Houston’s rebuilding process. 

Orlando City Midfielder Will Johnson Arrested On Domestic Battery Charges

Orlando City midfielder Will Johnson was suspended by MLS Wednesday following his arrest on domestic battery charges stemming from an incident early Tuesday morning at the player's home. 

Miserable August Sees Colorado Hand Player Of The Month Award To A Supporters’ Group

The Colorado Rapids played five matches in the month of August, losing three, drawing two and getting outscored 9-4 in the process. The most devastating defeat took place on August 26 during MLS’s Rivalry Week. The Rapids traveled to Utah to play Real Salt Lake and got rocked, 4-1.

With 22 points from 25 matches, Colorado are the worst club in all of MLS, and the club’s horrid August was mirrored in their voting for the HealthONE Player of the Month award.

More Important Things Than Soccer Going On At Houston Dynamo’s Stadium

There was no soccer this week at BBVA Compass Stadium, home to the Dynamo of MLS and Dash of NWSL. There were more important things to worry about in the United State’s fourth-largest city, inundated with up to four feet of water from Hurricane Harvey. 

Instead of hosting Sporting KC on Saturday and the North Carolina Courage on Sunday, BBVA became a collection site for Harvey relief donations, an orange beacon to the ravaged city. 

With Goals Like These, Italy Must Bring Back Sebastian Giovinco

Major League Soccer may be a retirement home for some, but David Villa affirmed last week you can still factor into one of the best national teams in the world while plying your trade in MLS.

So why can’t Sebastian Giovinco get a recall from Italy?

Villa earned a spot on the Spanish roster for the two upcoming World Cup qualifiers after starting the season with 19 league goals for New York City FC. These aren’t throw-away qualifiers either; Spain faces Italy for first place in UEFA Group G on Saturday. 

Hopefully 15-Year-Old Sporting KC Signing Gianluca Busio Isn't The Next Freddy Adu

Hey everybody, hop on the hype train, there’s plenty of room. Gianluca Busio is going to be the American Pelé and nothing is going to stop him. He definitely won’t flame out and play for a dozen clubs in a disappointing, prematurely ending career. He won’t, because we’ll force him, Robot Chicken style, to watch Freddy Adu highlights one after another. 

David Villa Earns Shock Spanish National Team Recall

New York City FC striker David Villa has earned a recall to the Spanish national team for crunch World Cup qualifiers against Italy (Sept. 2) and Liechtenstein (Sept. 5). Villa last played for La Furia Roja at the 2014 World Cup, but he retired after the nation’s group stage exit.

LA Galaxy Wave The White Flag, Sell Captain Jelle Van Damme

Thanks for playing, Los Angeles Galaxy. 

One year before LAFC comes to town, the Galaxy have seemingly given up on the 2017 season with nearly a third of their fixtures remaining. The club announced captain and stalwart defender Jelle Van Damme was sold to Antwerp F.C. for $235,000 on Friday.

Orlando Won’t Appeal Kaka’s Super Playful, Super Weird Red Card Goof

We’ve come to understand that VAR is going to get weird. There are going to be suspensions of play that feel strange, there are going to be offenses that are bizarrely non-reviewable, there are going to be goals disallowed for offenses in the buildup that’ll feel mysteriously idiosyncratic. It all comes with the power of time travel.

But the one surreal use of VAR we never expected would be the one ending with the brandishing of a straight red card to the wholesome Kaka, which happened on Saturday. This wasn’t your classic sending off — it was weird as s**t.