Quotes

This Training Story From Fulham’s Relegation Season Will Make You LOL

Fulham’s hiring of former Bayern Munich manager Felix Magath back in February of 2014 was one of the most quixotic appointments in the history of the Premier League.

Dani Alves Needs To Put A Quarter Up His Butt Because He Just Played Himself

During the quietest moments of the offseason, when nothing is stirring, not even Mino Raiola’s double chin, major footie outlets, without fail, turn to three sources to provide some semblance of news: #1. Diego Maradona — he’s guaranteed to have said something controversial in the last few days. #2. Sir Alex Ferguson — he’s guaranteed to have waxed lyrical on Cristiano Ronaldo or torn into Manchester United in the last few days. #3. Ronaldinho — he’s guaranteed to have done something, anything in the last few days.

Serie A Is Crying Out For A Player Like Christian Vieri To End Juve's Reign

Following their sixth straight Serie A title, it’s difficult to imagine the Italian top flight playing out any differently this upcoming season. Former Italian international and Inter Milan legend Christian Vieri admitted he thought as much when speaking with Corriere dello Sport on Monday.

Jose Mourinho Says Manchester United Got A Lotta Enemies

Speaking with the BBC, Jose Mourinho says that he "found a sad club" when he arrived at Manchester United. He also said, "We have lots of enemies. Normally it would just be Rostov but we have a lot more." Mourinho then did his own version of Drake's "Energy" off of If You're Reading This It's Too Late (not really).

(Play the video, but substitute the lyrics below.)

Pablo Mastroeni Puts In His Two Cents On The Theoretical Fight Between Man And Wolf

There’s been a question on the minds of Americans for almost a week now, a question that has given rise to a national debate: if former NFL Pro Bowl running back Arian Foster engaged in single combat with a wolf, which warrior would emerge victorious?

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