TV

Jean Michael Seri's Failed Transfer To Barcelona Was Like A Game Of Thrones Plot Line, Probably

Warning: Game of Thrones spoilers below (and Jean Michael Seri transfer spoilers if you're somehow DVRing that)

Transfer season is nearing its grand finale and storylines are all over the place and no one knows what will happen but everyone is excited. Similarly, America's favorite fantasy dragon incest jamboree has reached the conclusion of its penultimate season, and storylines are just as all over the place as the summer transfer window. In fact, I have noticed some striking similarities between the two.

Portsmouth Is Now The Most Magical Place On Earth

I don't know what will become of Portsmouth following its acquisition by former Disney CEO Michael Eisner, but I can't help but hope it turns out exactly like this:

Arsenal Owner Stan Kroenke Creates Entire TV Channel Devoted To Hunting Trophies

RIP Arsenal Fan TV. Long live My Outdoor TV.

The wondrous videos of Gunners supporters eloquently stating their dissatisfaction with Arsenal majority shareholder Stan Kroenke on Arsenal Fan TV will soon be a thing of the past. Kroenke has finally devoted himself to bringing home the biggest trophies. 

I Like Landon Donovan, But I Can’t Hear Landon Donovan

When the United States began their Gold Cup campaign last Saturday I was in a bar. I was there to watch this game, but somewhere around the 30th minute I started to drift. I was like a pass from the American midfield — serenely floating here and there without any purpose or sense of direction.

Dom Dwyer’s opening goal sent the bartender on a rambling ode to Sydney Leroux that lasted until tonight’s match against Nicaragua, a week-long sonnet on unrealized love. 

ESPN Steps Up Coverage Of Women's Soccer With Huge Plans For EURO 2017

Less than 20 years ago, if you wanted to watch the UEFA European Championships you had to dial up pay-per-view for every match. 

Now even the women's games are readily available as you can watch every match of UEFA Women’s EURO 2017 with a basic ESPN subscription. 

ESPN recently unveiled its plan to air all 31 matches at the tournament, which begins July 16 in the Netherlands. 

2017-18 Champions League To Be Livestreamed For Free Via Facebook

Teenagers and grown adults celebrated a triumphant moment of growing independence yesterday as they learned they’d no longer need their parents’ cable television login credentials to watch the UEFA Champions League online. A monumental deal between Facebook Inc. and Fox Sports will see the page livestream two matches on Tuesday and two on Wednesday throughout the group stage, four matches from the round of 16 and four quarterfinal games during the 2017-18 tournament.

Lucas Fonseca Took The Red Pill, And He’s Seeing How Deep The Rabbit Hole Goes

Here’s what happened between Bahia defender Lucas Fonseca and Flamengo striker Paolo Guerrero on Sunday night, as recreated by The Matrix. Fonseca came sprinting at Guerrero and said something like:

Fonseca proceeded to kick him, so Guerrero wasn’t pleased, and Guerrero said:

Minnesota United's Play-By-Play Commentator Calls The Office Action

Minnesota United play-by-play commentator Callum Williams has revealed how he prepares for match day by showing us his method at the office. Williams shows off an incredible lexicon with regards to the playing of a pass, and I'm going to be shouting "It's Quinn Hil-LER!" all week. 

This commercial is right up there with the best of them from "This is SportsCenter", well done you Loons. 

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