Humor

Dear Floppers,

Look, we get why you do it. You want a call and sometimes (especially in the penalty area), flopping and hoping for the call is a higher-percentage play than trying to get a shot. 

This message, we should note, is not directed at any single flopper, though some of you out there in soccerland might want to pay more attention than others (cough, Luis Suarez and Arjen Robben, cough).

You don't look cool when you flop. You look the opposite of cool, like a small child throwing a tantrum in a grocery store. 

Burnley’s a beautiful little market town in Lancashire, England with a population of around 70,000. The UK Government awarded the town the title “Most Enterprising Area in the UK” back in 2013, so Christian Benteke’s initiative in announcing his move to ‘Burnleyl FC’ via Twitter should come as no surprise. 

Things got a little out of hand during an English League One match between Oxford United and Peterborough United on Saturday. With neither side enjoying the finest of starts in England’s third tier, the awarding of a penalty in the third minute of second-half stoppage had major implications with the scores level at 1-1.

With Bolivia sitting ninth in the 10-team South American World Cup qualifying table, and having lost all three of their Copa America Centenario matches, newly appointed manager Angel Guillermo Hoyos is determined to get the most out of La Verde by going back to square one — the square where he determines who in Bolivia actually plays soccer.

Here at The18, we’re starting a movement. Lasting change has only ever been achieved when like-minded people come together to advocate or protest. In solidarity, we’re going to stop the flop.

I'm sorry, I don't actually know if you're having a worse week than Blackburn Rovers defender Shane Duffy. I don't mean to be presumptuous. It's quite possible you're having a worse week than Shane Duffy. If you are, hang in there. Get some sleep. It gets better.

But if you're not having a worse week than Shane Duffy, and it's very likely you're not, feel free to revel in this man's misfortune (soccer misfortune, obviously — real-life misfortune is nothing to revel in).

Paul Pogba's Manchester United introduction video was sweet when it was Pogba and "Stormzy", but it's even better when it's Pogba and Rick Astley.

This is a fine example of something we didn't know we needed until it existed.

Creators United. @PaulPogba x @rickastley : The new kings of @ManUtd. pic.twitter.com/Ntb07XT6mp

Barcelona midfielder Arda Turan drew the ire of Blaugrana supporters by liking and retweeting photos celebrating Real Madrid’s 11 European Cup wins. The Turkish international then clarified that his “account was hacked for a brief period”, resulting in this outpouring of love for all things Los Blancos.

Two days ago my account was hacked for a brief period. During that period 1 RT was made and 2 photos were "liked" without my knowledge.

Leicester City manager Claudio Ranieri has given his thoughts on what it would take for the Foxes to defend their Premier League crown. Essentially, Leicester will need E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial to touch down in Piccadilly Circus, London’s equivalent of Times Square.

Ranieri has never been one to champion his own side’s chances, at least in public. Last season, he targeted survival, then the top 10 and finally a Champions League place while the rest of the world declared Leicester City title favorites.