Men

Poor Neymar. The Barcelona striker finds himself embroiled in a battle between the Brazilian government and Barcelona over how much his transfer fee from Santos to the Catalan giants was. To make matters worse, as a result of some (read: more money than anyone reading this will see in their lives) unpaid taxes the Selecao captain has had $50 million worth of assets frozen.

This sum includes his plane. How is he supposed to fly to places now? Charter? Helicopter? Could he be reduced to flying (shudders) commercial? 

The Champions League is back and produced a number of highlight quality goals. Chelsea traveled to Paris to take on Ligue 1 leading Paris St. Germain, while Benfica hosted Zenit St. Petersburg. 

The goal of the day goes to Edison Cavani and his game winner. El Matador caught the Chelsea defense sleeping as his run left him 1-on-1 with Chelsea keeper, Thibaut Courtois. Angel Di Maria sent a long ball to Cavani who trapped it down and slotted it through the legs of the lengthy Chelsea keeper from a tough angle. Cavani's 78th minute goal will be crucial for the away leg in London. 

Cristiano Ronaldo has not scored a goal away from Estadio Santiago Bernabeu in over two months. His last goal in a road game was on November 29, 2015, when he scored the final goal in a Real Madrid 2-0 against Eibar in Ipurua.

Coincidentally, that was also Los Blancos' last win as a visitor until two weeks ago, when, thanks to a Luka Modric goal, Real Madrid got a 2-1 win at Granada.

Cristiano Ronaldo is pretty good at soccer. Let's not forget that. That being said, Cristiano Ronaldo's form this season has led people to whisper about a "decline" at Real Madrid, which we think is pretty ridiculous. So, we decided to take a closer look. 

We’re ten years into the era when Lionel Messi does things like this, and they just never, ever age.

Poor Celta defender Jonny Gomes was hung out to dry, put in a spin cycle, or any other laundry phrase you’re inclined to turn. That’s also Ray Hudson bwaaaaaaaahh’ing his approval when the reigning La Liga Player of the Month freezes the poor guy, dangles the cheese, and then takes it away.That led to this, the ensuing penalty, where Messi . . . passed?

Today, when we think of Ronaldo scoring we think of Ronaldo’s trademark celebration, in which he jumps, spins, and goes super saiyan. He does it nearly every time he scores, and he has made it his trademark. People across the world mimic it, even professional athletes in other sports like Odell Beckham Jr. But, this was not the first original celebration that Ronaldo invented.

The admiration and mutual respect that Philippe Coutinho and Neymar have for each other’s game is no secret. They’ve been close friends for almost 10 years now, their friendship dating all the way back to the time of embarrassing bathroom selfies, a formative point for anyone in their awkward teenage years. 

Trivia question: how many times has Lionel Messi won La Liga Player of the month? A hundred? Fifty?  Seventy five?

Answer: one. And it was last month. 

That's right, after 298 goals, making him La Liga's all-time leading scorer, Messi has finally been named Player of the Month in La Liga. The 28-year-old Argentine has won the FIFA Ballon d'Or four times, La Liga Player of the Year six times and the UEFA Best Player of the Year award twice.

And La Liga Player of the Month once.

The No. 9 in soccer, traditionally the number reserved for the team's starting striker, has been the subject of various discussion points over the last few years. From arguments revolving around the importance of the position in modern tactics to the belief that the No. 9 is being phased out of the game, doubts have been cast upon the future of the role.

Steven Gerrard will not be playing golf at a club that he applied to because of an incident that took place in 2013. Gerrard applied for membership at the Hillside Golf Club, but was rejected by the club due to an incident in 2013 in which a video surfaced that purportedly shows Gerrard punching a man in a street fight. 

We'll let you decide for yourself:

Steven Gerrard Maybe Punched A Person