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News

Giroud or Zidane: Whose Headbutt Was Better?

Olivier Giroud has said that Zinedine Zidane is one of his heroes. So it was fitting that during Arsenal's Boxing Day match against Queens Park Rangers, Giroud took a page out of his hero's book, headbutting QPR's Nedum Onuoha and getting tossed out of the game. 

This begs the question: whose headbutt was better? Lucky for you, we have broken down both headbutts so you don't have to use your precious time and brain cells to figure this one out. It's the least we could do. Welcome to The18 Battle of the 'Butts.

The Challenger: Olivier Giroud Headbutt

We'll start with Giroud's headbutt because it occurred most recently and is, therefore, we guess, the challenger. 

We don't want to say that Giroud's headbutt was warranted, but Onuoha did get him pretty good on the preceding play. Also, Onuoha deserves some kind of award for that acting job. It's too bad the Fallon d'Floor candidates are already in the books. 

That said, Giroud did headbutt a guy in the face. Giroud's headbutt gets a 6/10 on the soccer headbutt scale that we just made up. The face placement earns Giroud a lot of points, as does Onuoha's hilarious flop, and the fact that it happened on the day after Christmas. "Peace on Earth, good will towards men," not so much. However, Giroud loses points because it didn't really affect the game (Arsenal still won), and, if we're honest, Giroud didn't put a ton of oomph into the headbutt. Really it was more of a head-nudge. But still a really solid effort from Giroud there.

The Incumbent: Zidane Headbutt (a.k.a. The Headbutt Heard Round The World)

What can you say about this headbutt that hasn't alraedy been said? To recap, in case you were too young to remember (or living under a rock) in 2006: In the 2006 World Cup final, France's Zinedine Zidane headbutted Italy's Marco Materazzi in the chest, spawning many hilarious YouTube videos. The original:

This is the Holy Grail of headbutts. A perfect 10 on the just-invented headbutt scale. It swung the outcome of a World Cup final, for Pete's sake. Also, the fact that Materazzi collapsed like he had been hit by a tank and had to be taken off on a stretcher. That helps. The only thing that could potentially cause this headbutt to lose points is the fact that it was in the chest instead of the face, but that's trivial when compared with everything else. We'll let it go. 

The Headbutt Verdict:

Zidane wins, but Giroud was a worthy challenger. He should hold his head up with pride. Or not. He is a grown man who headbutted a guy in public, after all.

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