Humor

5 Easy Ways To Tell If Your Club Has Signed A Player

Transfer deadline day is one of the most confusing days of the year for soccer fans. So much information is flying around, it's difficult to keep track of it all. Have my club signed a player? Have they not signed a player? Have they given up? Are they still negotiating? I don't know! No one seems to know!

To help sort through the confusion, we came up with five handy ways to tell if your club has ACTUALLY, signed that big name, or if the signing is just a rumor blowin' in the wind.

Arsenal Fan Sings Godawful Song In Hopes Of Making Alexis Sanchez Stay

In The Midst Of Being Robbed By Other EPL Teams, Arsenal Have Been Robbed By Robbers

News broke Wednesday that late Tuesday night burglars broke into the Emirates Stadium in London and took off with “a large quantity of merchandise” from Arsenal. A police statement said the suspects were in a car and two mopeds.

The police did not say exactly what was stolen but we at The18 have obtained exclusive police sketches of the suspects.

These Five Incredible Locations Would Be Perfect To Host The Next World Cups

While the U.S. seems pretty confident it’ll lock down the bid to host the 2026 World Cup along with Mexico and Canada, never count out FIFA’s ability to shun the responsible decision by opting for the absurd. How else do you explain Russia and Qatar hosting the next two World Cups? Or these five awful hosts?

With that in mind, here are five places that FIFA is probably considering for the next few World Cups.

Jean Michael Seri's Failed Transfer To Barcelona Was Like A Game Of Thrones Plot Line, Probably

Warning: Game of Thrones spoilers below (and Jean Michael Seri transfer spoilers if you're somehow DVRing that)

Transfer season is nearing its grand finale and storylines are all over the place and no one knows what will happen but everyone is excited. Similarly, America's favorite fantasy dragon incest jamboree has reached the conclusion of its penultimate season, and storylines are just as all over the place as the summer transfer window. In fact, I have noticed some striking similarities between the two.

I Saw A Plane. It Probably Has Virgil Van Dijk On It

With rabid Liverpool fans having allegedly crashed a flight-tracking website while investigating Virgil van Dijk's whereabouts, it has become clear that technology cannot be trusted at this moment. We must know where Virgil van Dijk is and what he is doing, and if technology proves unreliable to our cause then said technology must be binned. As such, I have taken to staring up at the sky in search of transfer news, and that has led me to a stunning revelation.

How To Brush Your Teeth At A Champions League Match

Watching a Champions League match can be exhilarating, but you know what is also exhilarating? Having fresh breath!

One Hoffenheim fan at the club's Champions League qualifier in Liverpool last week decided he couldn't have just one or the other. He needed Champions League football and fresh breath.

David Beckham’s Infamous Red Card Reenacted By Robots Nearly 20 Years Later

David Beckham’s infamous red card in the Round of 16 at the 1998 World Cup was a defining moment in the flamboyant midfielder’s career. Some robots are hoping for a similar trajectory.

Beckham, then a gorgeous 23-year-old yet to settle down with Mrs. Posh Spice, was knocked to the ground by a heavy challenge from Diego Simeone in the second half of a 2-2 match. From his stomach, Beckham petulantly flung out a leg at Simeone. He was duly sent off and cost England a spot in the quarterfinals as La Albiceleste won as everyone does against England: on penalties.

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